Messangers are not required: Courting a woman

The problem with been a specialist is you get to know more about less, I didn’t say that; Father Jacobo from the youth centre has always said that, so he encourages us to be a Jack or Jacklene of all trades. I admire that, but am hooked up on the computer section and I just don’t admire the whole idea of doing tailoring. I mean I really tried, the nun took me to Mama Leah, that lady who has the dressmaking kiosk just around the other side of the butchery……..mmmmh her, and am telling you the whole week I had to hem all those clothes and sew together the pieces of rags under the Singer sewing machine at her feet, now I understand every training has got its own curriculum but to subject me to pure boredom in the name of becoming a Jacklene, I call it abomination.
Anyway that was just by the road, what is on the road is the latest saga, between Oti and Kepha. I know I have never talked about them, but Aunt Nera’s house is becoming a second home to me, and this neighbourhood is swallowing me up. Bak to the road, what I call vanity might be stupidity, or ignorance or arrogance. Why in any Man’s right mind would a man send another man to woo a woman for him, that is what brought about that fight between this two, right on our doorstep. Now this Oti is some big guy what those Nita’s girlfriends would call DTH, Dark Tall and Handsome, but the guy has fries for a brain, he decided that because he wanted Nita so bad that little fellow, Kepha actually his cousin, will do the errands in this matter. Well Kepha did just that wooed that Nita, but not for Oti, it was for himself, how he managed to outbeat that Oti, it can only be in what Oti lacks in brains, he has a short hand in that, well he must have seen the errand boy not making progress for him to show up finally right at the doorstep of Aunt Nera. This is where the village boys just outwit, this know it all city boys, your potential mother in law's house is a shrine that you just cant walk in like that, but the way I have seen them do it here, they would probably look their mother in laws in the eyes too!!!
Well that Oti had a rude shock, he not only found that there was a coup de tat’ but that in the whole new Kepha government he was extinct, but not before that Kepha arrived to pick up that Nita, that is when all hell broke loose. Twaf! Twaf! That is all we could here, it could have ended there, if it were not that Aunt Nera dagaa were drying on a mat outside, thanks to them those two good for nothings, are in the police custody, not for fighting..no..no the police just never get anything right…they are in for loitering with no purpose, terror suspects with the intention of disturbing the neighbourhood, Aunt Nera just had to make sure that Nita character doesn’t come in at all! Call it blood is always thicker!!

Bleeding from holes

The headaches dont seem to want to go away, every step i take seems to be some pounding inside my brains, the next thing I know I just want to knock this head against the wall,l and that is not a joke!
However there are things that I find to be a joke, one of them is the exaggeration of problems in relation to problems other people might have. Just the other day, that good for something, Josh comes around scaring everyone that their chickens had died, now chickens die, I mean this is a city, if a car cant stop on the zebra crossing for a human being believe you me , not even a crossing chicken counts. Well the other day it was all this SARS stuff, and the next thing you know everyone fears the other person, and suddenly the chicken owning neighbour becomes an instant enemy per se. I understand all that, but for Josh to expect us to believe ....what he said that their chickens died of a disease related to that one we saw on tv, that disease where you bleed from every hole in your body, aha, that is the one, that young man, he did get even the attention of the local chief, I didnt know towns in the city have chiefs, its not like a lot of this city dwellers keep enough birds to bribe the chief with occassionally for favourable decisions like in the village cases. Anyway the chief himself was there, and the rest of us slum dwellers, tagging along fearfully, I mean you really dont want to die from that wicked illness, it becomes taboo to be touched even when you die. Been an african, even when you are dead, we would still touch you, just to make sure the witch did not take an opportunity to slash any meat off your body for those hell knows kind of medicine, and love portions. But this disease that cant happen, .....so Josh claims had to be treated with a lot of heavy seriousness. There we are tagging along, me and Ikanta obviously deep in the crowd, but when we reach Josh's verandah, even the chief could not make one more step, I mean yes the government pay him for his job , but they wont pay him if he takes himself to the grave, would they?
We never saw the chicken, neither did we want to, we stood out there talking fear, mixed with anxiety and a sick excitement if Josh was really right, until the Ministry of health vans started arriving, pouring out men and women dressed all in white, gloves, gamboots, overalls, face masks, that Josh had better be right, that bleeding disease is not a joke, but how the hell it flew from Congo straight into Josh's chicken, is a question that young man should be made to answer, a penny for his wierd thought, cant bet on him been right!!!!

A post of Silence

I hope you are doing super alright, amidst the loss of a most loved singer like Angela, words run dry, and am lost for alot of them words, and for the great respect that I had for Angela, not just as a singer, or a christian, but for been a woman after God's own heart, I would leave it at that.
The kenyan Gospel scene will surely miss her, and personally as an artist and a lover of art, music is just one of those international languages that cut across borders, leaving us united in tunes.
Angela did a good job of it, a true worshipper indeed, who had a testimony to tell, for the few of us who got to attend her shows, or meet her in church, the artist in me had to lie low, mourning her, and praying for the loved ones who will miss her so, yet we can be rest assured Angela has gone home.

This is a post of silence, for yet another fallen loved one, whose works has been a great blessing.


Tomax

Angela Chibalonza-Inanibidii niseme(I have to say it)

R.I.P Angela Chibalonza

Its hard to say anything on this one, she has been called home, Rest In peace Angela, we loved you, you blessed us with your work in the ministry of Christ, and God loved you most to call you home even when we think it is too soon.


May He strengthen your family and loved ones during this time, am sure, you are in paradise with Him.



R.I.P, Angela

Mate to Mate

Now there are things even I have to teach some one, excuse any misuderstanding on the title of this post but I just could not get a way of italicizing it, because really in my home town, home country, the land of my fathers.....my motherland.... that is saliva...mmmmmmh ask anyone else....mate is saliva. I just have to riot about this, I know, the events of riots in Kisii like am them c in the tube.....just stupid hooligans with no morsel to keep on them table. Beats my senses, why would some big ugali fed men, circumcised for all I know be the stooge of political recycled busted and good for sitting beside the fireplace like that Kisii big pot bellied man be thinking anyway....I know , that is why i keep on insisting, politics, I leave it to those men who have been coming around here trying to get some boys from the neighbourhood to join, that so called youth for change, maybe they are serious this time, but I leave politics to them
This saliva thing I just had to raise, because the amonut that gets exchanged here, in the evening, mmmh is just ....enormous. Including that Nita, always wanting to go to the shops at night, I wish i had those, new shiny electronic camera, you just click and walla the picture just shows up, because yesterday I caught her, actually saw her live live, doing just what I detest most, passing that saliva of hers from this point to the next.....that big guy standing next to her. Why would anyone do that!!! Whats the point, bak at the village, you do that to give the babies porridge, its efficient and there is no way in the world, they are going to spit it bak. You hold it there, until you here that bubling sound of the porridge hitting there stomach. You cant leave hunger to take its toll on your little ones, when you are out farming for hours under the sun, but in this city, and especially around here, i dont see no hunger, no babies but yet when evening comes, oh the mate exchange begins!!!!

Brenda Fassie Vulindlela

T.I.A

Am getting one of those major headeaches I hear everyone crying about on Mondays morning, dont understand it but on Mondays, even that local son of the charcoal seller never gives the right change back, and always smiling up to me with his rust stained teeth, its hard to get those kind of thiings , amillion dollar smile from rusty teeth, wonder why everyone thinks the shiny glittering whitened teeth is worth any money trust me, that charcoal burner son, he smiles from his heart everytime I go to buy a debe of charcoal from him.
Deep down that touches my heart. I dont understand why our men just never get it. Walls have ears, and the astonishing stuff that goes on in our back yard(excuse my exxageration) i cant just keep quite about it. That mama Dennis was out in the water hole, same as usual except for that muffin swollen left eye on her face. You could here the city women folk there whis.... whis..... whispering to each other, with there lesos trying to cover thier mouths. But that Mama mboga just never knows when its the right time to shut up her talking outlet. There she goes...... "why dont you leave that husband of yours,,,mama Deno"
Now I understand that is one thing you just dont tell an African woman, not here anyway, I mean what kind of a man never disciplines his wife, failure to do that can only mean you dont love her enough. When you love her , you touch her, touch here means you remind her that you are the man, give her some thorough beating once in a while, let the women folk talk about it during the day and in the evening, you should make sure to be seen with a kilo of (nyama) meat, make sure the women sitting outside their houses...sees that!! Its manly, he beats you, but you know he loves you enough to have bought that one kilo of meat for you tonight, probably diner toppings usually include sexual reconciliation. But that is the way it is, TIA,
That swollen face of mama Deno, is not just what those women from the NGO around the corners says, violence...its different, its a sign of love, her husbands loves her enough to notice the wrong things that she does, and he is caring enough to give her some beating for it, and good enough to come back home with some sort of reconciliation package, its a break from eating all those green things that goats will seem to think there is a month long party, always in that house!!!

Cappuccino

Alot of stuff has been doing there rounds here, but the upper most is the modern civilisation of Nita, well there was another juicy story, but I will keep it maybe till tomorrow. I have to say this fast, outside there wind is blowing itself to madness seems like some sort of rain but from what Gran-ma used to tell me, a rain that wants to pour doesnt shout , it whispers, sometime it doesnt even do that, it just come...spontanoues! That is the word....my english teacher used to like it, she would always say...Be spontanous! You wont miss out on life! Doubt her though.
Well the modernisation of Nita, since she has had everyone's ear in the house listening to her latest rendezvous, she first asked ask what beverage we like. What kind of a damb question is that, as far as i know we take majani or orungi(tea or strong tea), and that Nita knows that if Aunt Nera wakes up feeling religious we take, Soya...it contains no nicotine, so she says, reducing our chances of getting addicted. My foot addiction is one thing, but to use the wrong platform to raise the issue is what I call misuse of intellectual resources. Bak to Nita, she comes in one eveining with all this stuff called Capucchino....then we say we dont know it, then she says Flapochino. Now, I know am limited in alot of things, but I would know from a marathon distance when someone is playing with my mind. Am sure no genius, but that Nita is a s good as any liar, in the village I know. Those words the same, but she insist that one is hot coffee and the other is cold coffee, who in their straight mind would take cold coffee, poor is a way of living back in the village but even I wont take cold orungi, poor or no poor, but its hard to define when Nita is just boasting how different she is from this place we are, and when she is just honest, you just never get it!!!!

Low Libido?*?

Excuse my language but yesterday was a day I would rather get off ma chest sooner. It is uncharacter of me to choose the fist to deal with my troubles, nut that sister of mine from my aaaaAunt Nera just forced my hand, and I had to forget my manners for a while and get lost in the tiny wrangles that could have been solved in anotherway. Anyway its all done and undone, and well maybe those cheeky friends of Nita are having a party over this, its what the local people here will do, take pride in winy fights like this. Every woman is afraid of the other thinking the other will take what belongs to her. Poverty is not enough to wreck things here, suspicions reigns high on the list. Even now things are not so good with Bobo, that new wife of his is not on a bed of red roses, she is on the thorns of the rose tree, to be sure. Bobo's love for the den is not the only thing that is taking him there, from the way the women near Mama mboga's place are talking, Bobo's reptile also serves Mama cham. The rumour is making its round, high and low, why would any woman want to leave her Pa home to come and lodge with Bobo as a wife, Bobo whom she has never seen, Bobo comiited to his illecit liquor, and the old woman who brews it!! But that is the way it is in the neighbourhood, does not matter to the women whether her man sleeps with the AK47 that he leaves and comes back with at midnight, doesnt matter if they bring no food, doesnt matter if there are no clothes on her back and her brood too lacks, she will fight for him, because, that man might be useless anywhere else(take the other day they had to riot because there men were losing their libido to the illicit brew around the den at the corner), but that same use less man gives that woman stature. Marriage here is a second maybe i should correct that, its the first identity, they have, and whatever it takes they will cling to it. Beats my logics!!!!

Rumour mill

Aunt Nera, she is nice...always was...taking me in like that, even when an extra mouth to feed in this city is just enormous responsibilty. And am grateful for that, who i dont like that much is just Nita. She picked a fight with me, today in the morning about some suff she is hearing on the grapevine, you know the rumour mill, about me been seen with one of her boyfriends. My foot, Nita should know just because am from some far from civilised village, that is my damn hometown and oh yes am proud of it, that dont mean she can tread on me and put some spirits know what blame on me. Well I had to be mad, mad enough for her to know, she aint bringing that up in the future, mad enough to deny, ok i know you know i met the so called boyfriend of hers, but by ma Gran-pa grave, I did not approach tat wretched boy of a boyfriend he came on to me, and I let him go like some hot cassava, long before Ikanta and I even became best friends! So I am the village hen, making my mark here, and the city gals dont like been talked to like that, so Nita pushes me against the door, and I just grabbed those fake long horses tail on her head, and it all just came out, no kinky hair like mine just some horse tail on her head!
Nita and i share some family blood, we shuld to the least respect each other, but she got it in her head that because am from the village, I got no nothing inside my head. That is an insult to my family background, she can have that fool of a boyfriend but if she abuses where I come from, blood related or not.......i cant take it sitting!!!

Borrowing neighbour

Have been thinking alot, about getting a job. Some work to bring in money. The cost of everything is just too high here. You buy everything even pepper, and onion, just about every little thing. Its not like bak in the village where most of that is just in the garden. I tell you even borrowing sugar from your neighbour is a taboo. You want to loose friends borrow salt from them, you see no one no more. But that is not the only thing, here your neighbour borrows from you, big things like TV and they dont get bak no more. The boys smoking glue, they would tell you where the neighbour went with the TV but they no talk to no one either
When a neighbour gets friendly its because they want to borrow, like the other day Bobo goes to Njoka's house, he has a shop across the burst sewer. But Njoka is not alone, anyway if he was Njoka's wife would not have let him in, he was with a smartly dressed gentleman. Njoka says the gentle man wanted Njoka, they go in but Njoka is out getting stock for his shop. They sit a while, then leave. It could have been left at that, but the gentleman comes bak the next day with a car to get the TV in daylight! Now who no brains person dressed up like that steals TV in daylight. Njoka this time in the house , a fight ensues. who in the ancestors name sold the TV. Gentleman says it was Njoka's wife...HOW she doesnt no nothing. Oh you do, me and Bobo were here, Bobo even got the remote from you for me to test if the TV is in good shape!
HA!! Njoka's wife just goes...blenk. Since when did using someone remote in their house adds up to testing a good in the shop????
Here it does,all Bobo had to do , was to pretend he knows someone in Njoka's house, and fills up the rest of the story with blanks that even Njoka's wife wouldnt catch, but will agree in thinking it is normal coversation, and the deal gets done. So a fool and his money parted, and Bobo was no where to be seen.
Here you have to be really careful they would sell your shoes, and everything you are wearing while you are at the busstop, then come and borrow it, on your way bak from wak in the evening, it happens....so u just dont buy expensive stuff keep it minimal, invincible and always even if you are Njoka, always make sure you have no change available for big money!!!

I am not alone

11th Hour

A second post of Silence to honour the fallen loved ones of September 11 attacks. God be with your loved ones, and may everyday brings them closer to healing.

A post of Silence

From Tomax

For the fallen artists in our music industry......and for Lady S. Sometimes it looks a little bit too soon, it can never be on time


Rest In Peace
Lady S

Lady S(R.I.P)

Joking

I know you think all this is just coming from my head, but you have to know Ikanta well to understand how serious she is about this juju stuff...it actually makes my skin shrink.
It was funny seeing her in church today, that evagelical church I told you about...mmmmhhh that one, she had her hands lited high up in the air praying, ask me another question I would tell you.... Ikanta needs to pray for her beliefs in Black Magic. I mean the evangelist said it clear......
Well we are at the youth centre again some of te boys, the ones playing at the basket court, they asked if were from the Catholic Parish, Ikanta lied she sid we were in first Mass, yes we were, but not in the Parish today. Ikanta likes moving around alot, like some sort of nomadic christian shifting from this church to the next, not bad but she is the one who made me come all the way here to her church and leave Aunt Nera's kundundu......
Another news Bobo went to church, and for 2 days he has not been to the Cham den, what women can do....Men cannot do!!! I have seen it with my own eyes, all those Bobo's friends could never make him go to church, and now his mother drops a wife in his lap and he is all a changed man, who needs a man if women can do all these?

Strangled chicken

Bobo is doing finer, we can all see that....I mean he ate that chicken. Ikanta tells me a lot of things now she says there is more to the chicken thatn can be said. I hope you are not getting lost, in thoughts here.

Ikanta says for that chicken to have worked, that chicken something must have been done to it, I mean there are two ways to kill the chicken. You cut off its head using a a nice tool, a knife mostly. But according to Inkanta the second way is the most dangerous because, if you do it like that and someone eats it....they are bound to do whatever you want them to, no questions asked, but it is usually used by those seeking for love, a correct word a love portion,only this take a bigger picture. Now the way to kill that chicken is to strangle it! Aha, dont ask me how in spirits name do you know a cut the neck chicken and a strangled, you wanna find out wait for the results. If a woman cooked that for you, her slave you would be, licking her feet, washing her with love, cooking for her, waiting on her, then my friend that African chemistry has caught up with you.

So now Bobo even got a job, at the construction site behind the Catholic church, well with all his staggering, and his luck of energy if he faints at the site, thank the heavens he has a wife to go home too. Oh and the slum women they have already started whi whi whispering somethings about Bobo's wife, they should be internet, they are just too fast!

A wife?

There was no sleep last night, not because there were no lights...no...no.......I mean here light could be the least of our worries, on a full stomach light is a luxury issue.

Bobo's mother, not really his mum who gave birth to him, but one of his late Pa's wives came over to see him. Now even the neighbours know, no one ever comes to see Bobo, atleast not his family all we see are guys from the Chan'gaa den, and i know he doesnt share the same blood with them, only the local brew. Aunt Nita, says that is not what will shock even the spirits in their sleep, what Bobo's mother came with is the NEWS!
No he did not only come with maize, and the chicken and the groundnuts, we know all that because even if Bobo is a local drunk, he loves children, he likes scaring them and seeing them run into the house after their mothers, but that is why all the neighbourhood kids always make fun of him, so we know his mother brought all that because he shared some of it with the kids the groundnuts, and took some maize to the den in exchange for a glass of Cham(chan'gaa).
The other thing that Bobo's mother came with, was a WIFE for Bobo. Now no one doubts if he should not have a wife, but from last night fight, Bobo seemed not to be happy with the whole idea. But his mother said if he is not careful he will die without a heir........... to his name. So he better take the wife and have some sons. Now everyone knows Bobo has a wife, we have not seen her yet, she has stayed in that house all day, and Bobo's friends had to call him outside to talk to him. Ikanta says once the WIFE cooks that chicken and Bobo eats it, the deal is done.....he is now married. Why would anyone want him for a husband, I mean he is committed to that changaa den like everyday.... and OH this morning, Bobo's mum had left, and she left the WIFE behind, so now Bobo will be wearing clean clothes soon!!

Chukua!

Let there be light

This might not be a problem to many individuals, I understand, but here this government is making it a problem, that is what everyone is saying. They say the whole government sent in some 'guys' from the pwer company to cut off electicity, anyway I wouldnt have known that if it were not for the total darkness that was in the house, I mean we couldnt even watch Timeless loveah that is Aunt Nera's favourite program, of course Nita always want us to watch the total english speaking channel. Oh yeah and i have heard her more than several times call us primitive, and am sure gone to keep that with me until i would need to level with her, you know emotional bribery, you never know when you need to collect a debt.....
Now going with the light was not the problem, the guys said that there were illegal connections. Now when you speak that in those rich estates, they would understand, I mean even the roads are not legal here, are they gonna make us walk on no ground because, they gone decide to take away the road?
Its hard to be logic when poor is all everywhere,so what them boys did was almost to mob the guys from the elecricity company, that is not fuuny I mean if u were therehmmmh... u culd see people gone to die because of doing there job!
But here reason dont reign, you cut the wire they kill you, you live the wire it kills them, Mama mboga's son Macharia died from an electric shock on the nursery school fence, but here even houses are illegal, I mean who builds a house with no toilet to go to? Sometimes only sometimes, occassionally the flying toilets gets around, sounds humourous but not until it lands on your head. The worst way to know someone has been feasting on beans and maize!!
I know, seems unreal but you have to be here, to get what I talk about, you get out of here, if you are not humble, I can promise, you wont get to heaven...nada!!

Househelps!

It is my honest opinion, that househelps should form a union to fight for their rights. I know am saying that because now i know how much the shoe pinches. I mean at Nita's house I do evrything, of course except i dont bring food on the table but still, I do everything.
Since Sunday some cousins of Nita from her fathers side came to visit, they look rich. But that is least on my mind what is upstairs in my mind is...even with a bigger number of us in the house now, nobody is helping. I was taught when we are many work should be easy. I mean what would farmers be doing producing more kids if not to provide more domestic and cheaper labour, I mean my grandpa said so. My feeling is that when you increase the number of family members beyond the ones the househelp knows about,isnt it human to increase the wage too.
I cook, they eat, they leave. I am equal here, I am Nita's cousin too..but my downside might be coming from the village, that is why slowly and surely I am been transformed into a local hand here, maybe this youth centre business is not worth all my efforts staying at Nita's I should probably upscale, maybe to other richer relatives, am not sure if going bak to the village will be better, I will have to go help mama in reaping the maize, but .....i have buts still

Jamila

Eno.....

Am full. I hope this doesnt make me look like less the lady am supposed to be, but I hate to my throat. Ididnt think Iate that much of anything...aaah am forgetting to tell you, we had been invited by some relative of mine, for some after birthday party. Only one person was invited anyway, I mean Nita but Aunt Nera insisted if she is going she will have to take us a long. I dont have biased feeling against Nita but she lives like our house in Kibich is just a passing place for her. She insisted me and my cousins, had to dress proper. Oh my when you think of it, proper is not what my sweet mama would call it. Its not the long skirts that am supposed to cover my feet with. Proper for Nita means we had to fit into some knee lenght skin tight type of long pants! Now I can let Nita have her own boyfren if she wants , but to become some so called Hitler woman in metarmophosising me into a modern woman, that is testing my chunya
Its an abomination to and disregard to the memory of my late grandmother, if she would come out of her grave, she would go bak immediately!
Now that is hard a thing for Nita look alikes to understand, I try to understand it too, but you wouldnt know, I mean I have worn my long skirts and my kinky short hair, for as long as my age. Well I went to the party, with my long clothes and Nita insisting that I walk with my small cousins. I didnt mind they need someone to help them cross the road, Nita just said walk ahead with them.
I ate. not a lot but I think I mixed things...today I just had to try out what Eno can do, I must have taken some nuts, some beans on the side, fish, fried potatoes, and some so called jiuces that tasted nothing like the fruits they are taken from, I wouldnt be cheated in buying that lemon juice for all the lemons i have eaten from my Ma's garden!

ODM presidential Candidate

Staying up late is not my cup of tea, but ....I just had to. Not because of been left out, I bother less for that, I mean the whole place...from Toi to here......everyone was glued to the TV. Even Mama Cham, oh she runs the local traditional brew den in the neighbourhood dens, she just had to put up that blak and white manually operated TV on top of the big drum outside her business premises.
Ok maybe have lost you but if you upgrade your local news information yesterday was that ODM presidential election thing. No one could miss it.....everyone here was all up and about it, and it didnt matter if you had just dropped into this city in the morning, everyone just thot the delegates are coming. But from Aunt Nera's stories, you can be a delegate for whichever party you want, even multiple membership is possible depending on how you fiddle your words. Anyway, talking too much sometimes mean less wisdom in the words.....Agwambo turned out to be the Chosen One, and for the first time since i dropped my feet into this big city... I actually slept at midnight, when the spirits are supposed to be on duty. In the city you wander if anyone ever sleeps...to be honest I doubt they do

an African woman...is a beautiful woman